Ok, I’m going to get a couple things out of the way in this blog.
First, I want to clear up a few misunderstandings.
I am not using donor sperm because it means that I will be able to choose gender, hair color, eye color, etc… Those things are impossible to do. Science is not there yet, and I personally hope that science never gets there. There are some things that we just shouldn’t be able to do. Like cloning, I think that we shouldn’t be able to pick genders or genetic traits like eye color. Pregnancy is a beautiful gift of LIFE that shouldn’t be terminated because baby has the wrong eye color.
Next, this post will not be for the purpose of openly bashing any individual.
I will not call out any names. The only way the person would become known is if they ended up outing themselves with a guilty conscience. If they do that, then it’s not my problem. I have not dwelled on this person’s opinion of me because I figured out exactly why this person would say what they said to me. This person is so miserable with their self that the only way they can feel better is to try to tear someone else apart. It obviously didn’t work. This blog is simply for other women who are considering becoming pregnant through nonconventional means to know what kind of comments they might face from people who are just looking for excuses to hurt other people. While this comment was the most shocking and ugly thing I’ve heard, I am confident enough in myself to know that I am doing what’s right for me.
“You are what’s wrong with society today. Its people like you who are completely destroying what the family unit is all about.”
Now let me explain exactly why I think that statement is total crap.
I am catholic. That means that it is my belief that the foundation of strong healthy families is faith in God. I plan to continue that belief as a parent, creating a strong healthy family, minus a biological father. A-hole is a self-proclaimed atheist.
A-hole – 0
Rachel – 1
Me: “I would think that you would be saying this to some teenager who just accidentally got pregnant, not to me. I’m making an adult decision that I am financially stable enough, and emotionally stable enough to have a child on my own.
A-hole: “That’s different! You are making a choice to have a family without a father! Those pregnant teenagers didn’t have a choice.”
Me: “Are you serious? You’re trying to tell me that they didn’t choose to have unprotected sex? I understand that rape happens, but the majority of teenage pregnancies are not the result of rape, it’s the result of irresponsible actions by children who are not ready financially or emotionally to have children.”
A-hole – 0
Rachel – 2
Me: “What about lesbians who are choosing to start a family using donor sperm?”
A-hole: “That’s different too. They didn’t choose to be lesbians.”
(Before I get any comments on this, I don’t care whether lesbians are lesbians by choice or not. That’s not what this is all about and it would be off topic to go in that direction.)
Me: “So the fact that I’m making a long thought out and informed DECISION that I can afford a baby and am emotionally stable enough to raise a child by myself means that I am directly contributing to the destruction of society?”
Me: “Your logic is stupid.”
A-hole – 0
Rachel – 3
As I mentioned in my last blog, I had to see a family counselor before I would be allowed to proceed with an intrauterine insemination. This counselor is the ONLY person who is qualified to make any judgments on what I’m trying to do, and she gave me exactly the words I needed to hear. She told me that my child will be luckier than the majority of children out there, because even though I’m not going to be perfect I’m making a smart and well informed DECISION.
Coming Soon! Why I Chose California Cryobank.
The Fertility Blessing
You know my deep desire for a child. A little one to love and to hold, to care for, to cherish. Grant that my body may conceive and give birth to a beautiful, healthy baby in Your holy image.
Guide me in all my choices so that this conception, my pregnancy and my baby’s birth are in line with Your will.
Heavenly Father and Holy Mother, hear this prayer of my heart, mind and spirit.